The link above will take you to an article in the women's section of the guardian. It's about Jenny Block, a woman who has just released a book detailing her experience of being in a Polyamourous relationship.
I have no issue with polyamoury - my attitude is the same as it is to other forms of sexual behaviour- providing one is safe and consenting then go for it and please feel free to get your rocks off however you and your partner(s) should jolly well please. I'm also becoming of the opinion that monogamy/non -monogamy is as much a part of someones sexuality as their orientation. So for the record I'm a monogamous bisexual.
The reason I'm blogging about this article is this paragraph :
"Jenny says she's bisexual but I do wonder if she is a lesbian who realised after she married and had a child that she prefers sex with women but is not willing to give up the conveniences that come with a heterosexual lifestyle. Reading between the lines, is she having sex with Jemma and simply living with Christopher?"
Throughout the whole article there is a badly disguised tone of condemnation for this woman and others like her who choose to have polyamourous relationships. It seems as a society we cannot grasp onto the idea that actually monogamy may not work for all people and that there are other options. Sure being poly isn't for everyone. I don 't think I could handle it if my partner wanted another girlfriend and I'm fairly certain he couldn't handle it if I wanted a girlfriend. But for many couples it is an arrangement that works. Given the divorce rates, pure monogamy is obviously something that for many people has it's flaws.
The condemnation of polyamoury isn't my only issue. It's also the fact that it leads into wider misogyny. Men can be non monogamous with or without their partners consent, men can sleep around, and it's widely accepted that men can have high sex drives. For a woman to participate in any of those behaviours is seen as deviant.
We may have the vote, but women do not have sexual freedom. And I'm not convinced its something we will achieve any time soon.
The condemnation of polyamoury isn't my only issue. It's also the fact that it leads into wider misogyny. Men can be non monogamous with or without their partners consent, men can sleep around, and it's widely accepted that men can have high sex drives. For a woman to participate in any of those behaviours is seen as deviant.
We may have the vote, but women do not have sexual freedom. And I'm not convinced its something we will achieve any time soon.
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